You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
