Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
These tits shall not be calmed
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
