I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
