one two three fourrrrnication!
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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