so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize