I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
