This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Mom said you looked used
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
