this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
