apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
