I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
