We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i came on her dog
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize