Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
