Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
