Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I could fuck to npr.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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