Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
