Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
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