capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My breasts were aching with rage.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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