kristin has been a bad kristin
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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