Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize