I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Randomize
