we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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