you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
