it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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