im gay
i know
yea but for you.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
