So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We have started to decorate penises.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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