That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
