i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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