His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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