all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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