If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
My friends, they love my intelligence
My first STD was from a foam party
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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