the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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