i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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