Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
