he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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