You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
