Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
We got so high we made milksteak
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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