I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Randomize
