She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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