Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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