we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
