wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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