i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
