If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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