The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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