4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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