Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize