operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
