I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
you never un-have a 4some
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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