Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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