I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
