just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
